This is based on a true story. I truly hope that many women will open their eyes after reading this article to whoever is out there pouring his manly heart out to them. Sincerity is not something transparent, although sometimes we think it is. You will never know you have swallowed poison until it is officially flowing in your very veins!
I sincerely hope that after reading this article, many women take serious action in protecting themselves and those who they love and care, and also informing and alerting other women to be more aware of what is truly out there…
Men may say that marriage is a trap. But sometimes it is the woman who is trapped. NOOR AZURA AHMAD (writer for Her World) uncovers the emotional angst of a repressed wife.
heart in chains
Elisa*, 37, snuggles contentedly against Giovanni*, her husband of two months, and declares, “I SO love this man… NOW I understand what love is all about.” Looking up coyly at her husband, she admits to spritzing on perfume and dolling herself up just before he arrives home. “I’m smitten.” She manages to look sheepish while grinning from ear to ear. Giovanni laughs heartily, evidently pleased with her confession. Squeezing Elisa gently, Giovanni, or Khalid* as he is also known, gives her an affectionate peck before leaving us to this interview. Knowing that we would be delving into a painful period in her life, Elisa braces herself for the inevitable.
“It all began when I was studying in the UK. I met Pieter* through a pen pal programme organised by a student’s association. He was studying in the Netherlands, working on his doctorate. We actually wrote to each other the old fashioned way – using pen, paper and stamps.” Elisa always thought of him as a friend, but Pieter’s writing became increasingly personal. Friends pointed out that Pieter was definitely interested but Elisa played it cool.
Coming from a troubled family, Elisa did not witness much affection between her own parents. After they divorced, Elisa stayed with her mother but she understood her father better. Her mother opposed her relationship with Pieter but Elisa didn’t care. She had no interest in the rich boys her mother kept throwing her way.
Elisa and Pieter finally met in person when a friend dragged her along on a trip to Amsterdam. Pieter put them up in his apartment and accompanied them sightseeing. The very next day, he took Elisa to meet his parents. After that, they visited each other occasionally and kept in touch via telephone. Soon, both of them graduated and started working. Two years later, he asked her to marry him and she accepted.
“The truth is, I never really loved him. But he was there and it was the logical next step, so I said yes. Three days before the wedding, I left town. Somewhere deep inside, I didn’t want to marry him. But when I came back, he begged, and I relented. I think my father saw Pieter’s true nature. After the wedding, he specifically asked Pieter to take care of me.” His promise was just words, however.
Posted in Cultural diversity, East/West, Project Safety Net, Projects, Uncategorized, women
Tagged abroad, alert, awareness, Broken relationship, couple, domestic violence, Dutch, East/West, emotional abuse, emotional angst, Europe, family, frustration, immigration, inform, information, Lifestyle, love, man/woman, marriage, mixed couple, physical abuse, protect, protection, relationship, repressed, safety, Safety Net, trap, woman
There is a new project buzzing around the local neighbourhood. I heard this through a contact of mine. We accidentally bumped into each other 2 days ago at one of the Youth & Family Development centres. The last time we spoke, I told her about my idea to propose a project in exposing children to multiple languages at very tender age.
Apparently that somehow caused some sort a chain reaction since, mysteriously out of the blue, she suddenly told me that she (and other colleagues) are in the process of trying to propose some sort of programme to develop children’s mind from birth till they are 4 years old.
Unfortunately we had to cut our conversation short due to appointments we both had to attend (but at different location with different people), but now it gives me a very strong impression that people do think the idea of teaching children and exposing them to new methods of learning, or a new language, etc. is extremely important in order to maximise the potential of the child’s mind and to gear it up to its fullest capacity. I have to say; I got excited! And I fully support this notion.
Posted in Cultural diversity, Early learning, Language learning, Languages, pedagogy
Tagged child, children, communication, Cultural diversity, culture, diversity, Dutch, East/West, Europe, european project, information, language, Language learning, Languages, learning, mixed couple, pedagogy, piccolingo, preschool children, project
A dying rose
I was in the city centre when I first met Mea Pia. She was actually a friend of a friend’s. By the look in her eyes, I could see that she was suffering intensely. I predicted it had everything to do with relationship but the subject was never brought up. My friend briefly introduced her to me, but most of my conversation were mostly engaged with my friend instead, until at one point she felt like talking.
“I found out you went through a painful divorce,” she said to me, trying to stir a conversation. All I did were raised my eyebrow and smirked. I didn’t feel like elaborating that topic so I kept silent. I guess because of my ‘cold shoulder’ she decided not to continue the conversation.
Suddenly, until, we met again in the city centre.
“Hi, remember me? Mea Pia…” she touched my shoulder and I quickly turned around. “Ahh.. yes! I remember you. How are you?”
“Not so good,” she sincerely told me. “I’m sorry but I need to talk to you about something. Do you think we could talk privately?”
Posted in Project Safety Net, Projects
Tagged abroad, couple, domestic violence, Dutch, East/West, family, immigration, man/woman, migration, mixed couple, relationship, safety, Safety Net, Thai, Thailand, the netherlands, woman, women
On 17 December 1999, the United Nation General Assembly designated the 25 November as the Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women. Since 1981, women activists marked this day as a day against violence.
Based on country data available, up to 70 per cent of women experience physical or sexual violence from men in their lifetime.
Posted in Project Safety Net, Projects
Tagged domestic violence, East/West, mixed couple, relationship, safety, Safety Net, UNIFEM, United Nations, woman, women